ME with Boy? Never!

So I think I’ve waited to write just long enough so that no one at all is checking this site anymore.  Excellent!  I had actually given up. I had accepted that my life is just too busy.  That I don’t have all that much to say. And that even if I did have anything to say I didn’t know how to write it in an interesting manner.  Then today I found a website where young professional women are blogging about issues of work and life balance.  I found the site interesting but didn’t think anything of it.  Just another website.  This afternoon my boss said… “Well at least you’re winning!”. Suddenly it occurred to me that I had a whole lot to say about work and life and about balancing and about figuring out who you are as a professional and as a woman.  Now why you ask, did that minor comment stir such a reaction?  See I’m an attorney. I belong to a profession where the “Well at least you’re winning!” comment should have filled me with pride.  I should have been glowing. Smiling from ear to ear with the happy knowledge that I was doing my job!  Go ME!!!!  The thing was I didn’t care.  I mean not at all!  I mean I guess a small little part of me was pleased that I could show my boss that I am indeed wonderful. But the victories themselves were hallow.  It occurred to me that “winning” those cases didn’t really matter to me at all.  What mattered to me were the fabulous wedding gifts I was going to buy for my friends.  The baby shower I was going to co-host for another friend.  The weekend trip I was going to take. And the hope that The Boy would put the dang diamond ring on my finger sooner rather then later (not that I’m in a rush or anything but it would be nice to plan my own event and not just everyone else’s, especially since he KNOWS he’s going to do it soon!!!)  THAT mattered to me.  And it occurred to me that maybe THAT was worth talking about.  Maybe it was worth discussing how I was going to work out being satisfied with my job and being satisfied with my life.  Maybe it was even worth discussing that with other women who might be feeling some of the same pulls I was.  So there you have it.  No one will probably read this ever, but I still think it’s worth writing.  At very least I can talk to myself about balance and, who knows, maybe I’ll even achieve some.